I think anyone that talked to me this week noticed I'm on a rollercoaster of emotions. Trying to settle in and make new friends is a difficult task. I did the comedy club thing and that was ok but I don't know I probably should have gone to watch the boys from work play Halo 2 instead....
Friday was the hockey game and I chose the restaurant. It was a pretty good place and the game was fun. But throughout the night I realized it's going to be a tough task to actually become friends with these guys. How did I become friends with you? I don't give up a lot of information at first and I really won't let my opinion show at first. No matter how much I try I just can't. The best example from Friday would be the ride to the game. I road with my boss and another guy. My boss decided I needed to pick the music we listened to on the way there. I said I didnt care, I honestly didnt. Well he turned of his ipod and said we'd ride in silence. He couldnt handle that, so my windows got rolled down and locked so that I couldnt put them back up. He tried to force me to make a decision...that's more of a reason not to decide :) Then he started blasting kid's music, I never did decide. My boss actually said he didn't know if he'd like to have a wife like me....one with no opinions. AH! I do have opinions, I just I don't know have problems sharing them with other people. As Nik said, I always just want to make sure everyone around me is happy first. I put myself towards the back...not the last priority but not the first. So once I understand what other people like, then I guess that's when I start showing more of my opinion, is that right? Is that what I do? This is going to be hard considering I just work with these guys. I'm doubting I'll get invited to too many other activites because I've already turned down Halo 2...I didnt even get invited to play after work really...that's why they all came over to pick me up at my apartment. I don't have much in common with the guys, but they are my best shot at meeting people and I have to spend a lot of time with them so I want to get along with them. :(
Ok enough of that. I would also like to say I think I'm abnormal when it comes to phone usage. Lots of people used to find it hard to believe that B.J. and I talked on the phone nightly for at least an hour. They couldn't understand what we could possibly talk about, you just have things to talk to your boyfriend about you know? I know a couple of you understand because well you deffinatly take part in such activities. Well now I'm repeating this with another person, actually one of those doubting people. We talked for hours last night, I think close to 8 hours....I know a bit excessive, but we really don't realize how long we are on the phone for. He now understands how B.J. and I talked so much...I don't think I really do, I also don't understand how we got into this routine of talking every night. I'd like to remind everyone I am single, so this person is not my boyfriend, just a friend. A really close friend but just a friend. My life is so damn unfair.
Enough sad thoughts for one entry. I'm going running with Kristy today, so hopefully I'll be in a better mood later. I miss you all.
2 comments:
How did we meet? Umm, my first memory of you was at the first floor meeting. You were on the opposite side of the room and Claire and Anne introduced you as being their only resident for a while. And then, well, we lived on the same floor and we weren't minorities, so we hung out with the group of people. (That may sound bad to non-Alice people, but it's not because we descriminated or anything.) And then we were the two that stayed home a lot of Friday nights (remember the time Kate turned the light off on us when they left?), but even then we didn't hang out all that much. I'd say we really started being friends around the time of Mike O'Niell. (Of course, I'd already held your hand. ;-)) At least that's when I remember talking to you more. So that means it took a while. And really I think we only became really good friends over that summer because we were both online every night before you went to camp, and then we wrote letters. I think we went back to school better friends than when we left. SO, give it time hon. I know it's hard, but you'll make friends. Maybe you'll find your good friends somewhere besides work. Like your running pals or if you decide on a church.
Also, 8 hours is a whole night's sleep (more than a night's sleep for most people). How did do that? I mean logisitically, unless you were up all night, how did you talk 8 hours last night?
Well, I make silly and out-of-left field comments, eventually one of them is going to make someone laugh. But most of the time I just look foolish and should probably keep my mouth shut. Hell I yammered on about James Bond for how long during our Target team orientation? Nik, any clue? I could say just be yourself but thats the hardest thing in the world to do, So play to the crowd and see what happens!
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